F & W Tuesday, York

It was quite a nice morning and I had decided to hop on a train to York. I had been before but never got a good look around as that time it was just before Christmas and was very busy.
The train journey was uneventful. It was actually quite relaxing reading a book and listening to my mp3 player.
When I got to York I went for a walk along the city wall.

From there I made my way into the city centre and found a shop that had a Tarot deck I'd been looking for. I bought a couple of other things as well. Already the trip had been worth it and it had also turned into a nice sunny day.

I also wanted to visit The Jorvik Viking Centre. I've got a fascination with Celtic and Norse history in particular. Going slightly of topic there is a history of Transgender Shamanism in Europe that stretches way back and Shamanism is probably the world's oldest spiritual discipline which dates back to the dawn of recorded human history. Visible signs of it have been found in Australia, the Americas, Siberia and parts of Europe. It's never been an organised religion more a spiritual discipline. It has probably been here before any religion.  

I would be very interesting if someone wrote a book about the transgender aspect of humanity throughout history.

Back to the Jorvik Centre which I think is built upon a Viking settlement. The main part is a ride showing how they lived in those times. Below are a couple of pictures.

  

After the Jorvik Centre I took a walk down to the river and got a couple of photos.

It was a bit windy so I got a couple of more out of the wind away from the banks and one of a duck who looks far better than me.

 

I found The Shambles a fascinating street that was like going back in time if it wasn't for the throng of tourists.

One shop caught my attention. and I bought a gift each for my friends back in Manchester.I don't think they really know how much they help me and have helped when I am in Manchester. There are a lot of things I would be unable to do if it wasn't for them. It's always nice to be able to say thank you in at least a small way.

Below is a  picture of a sheep I came across.

I must admit I found it quite funny.

I got some more photos at the Mansion House, but time was moving on and I decided to get back to Manchester. I'd had a lovely day out. I wish I'd got more photos for my own memories as this blog is, but that wasn't possible.

The next day would be my last day.

When I got back to Manchester after getting something to eat and a quite evening in Paddy's Goose I called it a night.

Wednesday my friends would be out and I would meet some new girls. I'll end this with a couple of photos outside The Mansion House.

 

F & W Sunday and Monday

Sunday
Sunday was a very quiet day I did a bit of shopping. Ended up getting into a sort of conversation with a very drunk woman in Paddy's Goose. It turned out a few of her family were in as well. I decided to make an exit to the hotel. I had to get packed ready to move to The New Union.

Monday

I woke up just before 8 and finished packing. I had to be out of the room by 11am. I was ready by about
9 30am. I didn't want to leave to early. My bag was very heavy and took some creative packing, making sure my male clothing was easy to get to if needed. I do worry that things will go wrong. A lot of people were checking out.
Below a couple of pictures I took in the hotel-

I was told I could check into the New Union about midday so after I checked out I had some time to kill.
I dragged my bag into the Village and went for something to eat in the Olive Deli. Dragging the bag down to the New Union. I got checked in straight away. A lovely man who checked me in, treated me like a lady carrying my bag up to the room. I must admit it was a nice feeling.
That evening I went to Paddy's Goose and got talking to Penny another tgirl and a American based ex-pat. We ended up  speaking about various world events. The ex- pat a nice well mannered bloke asked us about why we were trans. He was gay and as I have found the homosexual community has about as much knowledge   about us as the hetrosexual. Unless you are Transgender I guess you wouldn't except perhaps if your partner is trans. I might be wrong but when people gay or straight ask me about myself  they always seem to be the same questions.
The ex-pat said I looked cute, but thought I would probably look cuter as a bloke and couldn't believe my age when I told him. I guess there was a compliment in there somewhere. I told him I wasn't gay and he accepted that with a few more questions. To be honest I don't really like sex. It reminds me of who I am and something I can't change. The drive is virtually gone and very rarely do I feel it. I think I know why but that I think is far enough. I don't have a problem generally as a bloke, it's just there are somethings that bring things into a really sharp painful focus.
The night came to an end and I left Penny and the ex-pat who I think went to New York-New York club.
The next day, Tuesday I had plans for a daytrip away from Manchester.

F&W Leeds First Friday

Friday

Diana was moving out of hotel as she couldn't keep the room in the New Union as the weekend was busy. I had decided to stay a further 3 days. I went down to help her move her luggage to the car. Diana had lent me a small bag for taking some clothes through to Leeds as we were booked into a Travel Lodge for the night.
With everything in the car boot we set of to Kate and Kitty's.
When we got to their house Kitty made us a lovely breakfast. Kate decided she would get changed in Leeds so decided to travel as Bob.
We set off and had the option of 2 routes. Diana picked the right route and avoided the backed up traffic from a fuel protest.
We got to Leeds after a good run. After checking into the hotel, I needed to buy some tights so I said I was going to take a walk into the city centre. Kitty decided to come in with me as she  had  never been round the shops. I got my tights and then took Kitty on a quick tour. In the market she found tights that she really likes and finds hard to  get. In one of the shopping arcades which was full of really expensive shops filled  with clothes and jewellery  that  a girl can dream about. We found one shop that was overwhelmingly feminine. It was done out like a shop from the early part of the last century. When we went in, the absolutely beautiful scents hit you from the perfumes, lotions and bath salts. Downstairs were some stunning dresses. Designs from a bygone era.
"I'm in girly heaven",  Kitty almost squealed in delight. It's times like this I really wish I was a real girl as Kitty is. I could appreciate her delight   The bath salts were made to look like delicate cakes and fooled me. I had to smile there was a bloke in the shop with his wife and he looked a bit uncomfortable looking like he wanted to bolt. I guess my appearance in the shop didn't help. The shop assistants were great and really nice and after Kitty bought some bath salts we left to get a coffee.
In the coffee shop I got a seat and asked Kitty to bring the coffee over as my internal wiring is a bit wonky and I sometimes drop things.
After a coffee we went back to the hotel for a nice evening meal with Diana and Kate.  I got ready for our night out. This would be a rarity for me I would get out of my jeans and wear a skirt. It is not that often I wear a dress or skirt, but it is nice to every now and again.
The first place we went was Blayds bar then Fibre where I saw Gemma and her girlfriend. I hadn't seen them since I was last in Newcastle which was about a year ago. Then we went to The Loft in Queens Court.
After a lot  of dancing I felt very tired and decided to go back to the hotel. It had be another wonderful day with my friends.

Saturday

Saturday morning I got up for breakfast. It was now becoming routine doing my make up After a shower and shave. While I was waiting for the lift. I knew out of the corner of my eye there was a bloke staring at me. Here we go again. I decided to take the stairs. He followed me and I vaguely heard him say something. Down in the reception I heard Kate's voice from behind me. I turned and saw Kate as Bob.She was  the person at the lift.I felt such a fool.  We had a laugh about it and went for breakfast. Diana and Kitty appeared and joined us.
After breakfast we headed back to Manchester. Diana would stay at Kate and Kitty's  with all the stag and hen parties invading The Village the hotels were booked up. We had a good Saturday night in The Village. It is a shame the stag and hen parties come to The Village I think it does spoil things to an extent.
I was at the half way point of my stay. I would be on my own for the next 3 days, but I would see Diana and Kate on Wednesday. Unfortunately Kitty wouldn't be able to make it out.

F& W Thursday

I got up after a wonderful first night out. I didn't really care about sleep, but I did manage about 6 hours. I decided to take a wander. Diana who was staying at the New Union was having a bit of a lie in. The plan was to meet up with Kate and Kitty at the Trafford Centre.
I went out for a wander and then met up with Diana. We drove out to the Trafford Centre to meet up with Kate and Kitty. Out shopping we went in M&S. Kitty needed some new shoes and I got a pleasant surprise in the shoe section. They were doing wider fit shoes. The only problem was they still only go up to a size 8. Even though that was still to small I decided to try one on. I might be lucky a size 8 in the wider fit might just fit. Well imagine my delight when I found it was to big. I found a 7.5 that was very comfortable. Another shop where I can buy shoes.
In between shopping we went for a meal in a Spanish restaurant. Below is a picture of me and Kate. I am wearing glasses because I couldn't read the menu.

I think the picture shows how happy I was. If Diana reads this, thanks for taking the photo.
Some more shopping and then we went back to Kate and Kitty's where we had a lovely evening meal courtesy of our wonderful hostesses.
It came time for Diana and myself to get back to the Village. A drink in Paddy's Goose and then Naps which we were surprised to find open. The fantastic second day ended. I said goodnight to Diana and thought about Friday.
Leeds was next and First Friday.

Fire and Water

Wednesday

I left home on a cold wet morning. Every time I go to Manchester it feels like I am stealing away on some sort of secret mission. No one knows where I am going. I more or less disappear in more ways than one. My male aspect becomes overtaken by my feminine. It is not just how I dress, it's how I feel. 8 days living as near to being female as I can is a beautiful spiritual experience.
My whole belief system and what I know about myself was shaken to the core 7 years ago during the month of April. Then during the month of April a few years later I was hit again with another life changing event which scared the hell out of me.
There is a popular UK soap opera that is running a story about a transgender person who is the victim of a vicious assault. The background story of the character from what my friend Diana told me has parallels to my own. I have not seen it and to be honest perhaps that is just as well. If it helps lessen the violence and discrimination and shows transgender people as human beings that don't deserve the crap thrown at us. I will applaud the people who made it. We can but live in hope. 
Ok on with what I got up to this time. I got into Manchester on Wednesday just after noon. Getting of the train I felt like I was plugged into a vast energy source coupled with complete joy. It felt like I was back home. I've called this post 'Fire and Water' because in some esoteric systems fire can be a symbol of energy and water the flow of emotions. My emotions were heated and the emotional energy flow directed towards a beautiful path. Some say there is no magic in the world, but getting of that train again I entered what I can only  describe as  a magical place, inside and out.
I couldn't get my hotel room for about an hour an half so I went to Taurus.  Kate had said she would be out early and who should walk in just after I had got a beer, Kate. It was lovely to see her. We had a good chat and joked about the massive bag I had parked by the seat. Kate looked lovely and I guess I looked a bit rough.
It came time for me to get my room. When I got changed  I felt even better if possible. Meeting up again with Kate I had said I needed to get my nails done so off we went to a nail bar in the Arndale Centre. 
My nails done a nice dark red I felt complete. The one thing that I feel always signifies the changeover to a more feminine aspect is when I swap over watches.
That night we met up with Diana and Kitty for a lovely meal in Chinatown. It was great to see them both.It had been  4 months which is way to long. I was out with 3 of the best friends anyone could be blessed with.
After the meal we visited Concord where I paid my membership, 3 months late to my shame. I met Vanessa a lovely lady on the committee. She had mixed up my membership status on the MC forum.
We finished the night with some dancing in Naps.
A wonderful first night came to an end.
Fire and water had combined beautifully. I still had a wonderful week to go.

New Hair

Slightly different and slightly longer hairstyle. Ok it's a new wig, but I just love it.
It's been 4 months since I was last out. Today I went to the cinema to see the historical epic The Eagle and bought the above.
I've been having a wonderful time and I will relive on here when I get home, but for the moment I am not finished. 

Full Circle

Saturday
Diana couldn't get her hotel room for the Saturday night so she had to vacate her room. I had said to her to leave her case in my apartment. Kate and Kitty had invited us to their home for a meal that evening.
Diana came over and after a coffee we went to the Olive Deli by Sackville Gardens for a bite to eat.
We spent the afternoon shopping. Diana bought herself a nice pair of boots and I bought a battery operated cat that rolled round with a loud laugh when switched on which was for Kate and Kitty.
We had been invited out to Kate and Kitty's  home for a meal that evening. We did take a couple of wrong turns finding their house, but eventually found it.
We had a lovely meal and a wonderful girls night in. Diana showed us a DVD she had made of her trip to Fantasia Fair in the States. It came across as what must have been an amazing experience. I could see the emotions playing across Diana's face. I could only imagine the beautiful memories she must have and the sadness that it was now in the past. I think that events like these change you and add an intangible positive element  that stays for life.
I hope if she reads this she does not mind my thoughts in the last paragraph.
The evening came to an end. Diana took me back to The Village.
I had one more day in Manchester.

Sunday
The first four days had been a wonderful time and the best part had been seeing my friends. One day left I would spend by myself. None of my friends live in Manchester, but they go out of their way to make my times out very special and for that I cannot thank then enough. I really am so lucky.
Sunday morning I decided to start packing after I got ready to go out. There was no hurry to go anywhere. I had been toying with the idea of going on the train somewhere for a day out. It was very cold and the weather was turning nasty so I decided against it. Instead I decided to go to the cinema. I went to the Printworks Cinema to see what films were on. I decided on a sci fi film Skyline. The film about an alien invasion was ok if not horrible. The effects were good and sort of overtook the storyline.
After the film I headed back to The Village. Later that evening I headed out again to Paddy's Goose a traditional pub in The Village. It wasn't to busy so I found a table to sit at. A couple of gay guys asked if they could sit at the table. We got talking. They asked about my sexuality, was I going to transition etc. They said it was a shame I was straight, but good I wasn't going to get it chopped off as they put it. I had to smile as I hadn't had sex for years, so it wasn't much use any way. I think they got a bit confused during the conversation, so they asked, do you really want to be a woman? My answer was yes, but when it comes down to it I have an overwhelming fear that the transition process would destroy me, so I do what I do.
The next question was whether I saw myself as a transexual or transvestite? I replied that I am just what you see whatever that is. Eventually the conversation came to an end, they both shook my hand and wished me all the best for the future.
My night came to an end about half an hour later when 2 drunk trannies managed to soak one leg of my jeans by knocking over a drink mucking around and making a general nuisance of themselves. I must admit I left in disgust those 2 really were acting like a couple of drunk blokes in women's clothing. I must admit that behavior is something I hate to see.
The 5 days had come to end. It had been another special time for me. In a way I had come full circle staying in the place I had stayed in when I first came to The Village  I don't know but have a feeling a cycle has ended and a new one is beginning. I know there could be some tough times on the horizon. I have written this and the last 2 posts with a bad dose of the flu which I am now getting over.
One thing I did take part in while in The Village was Kissing Without Prejudice, below is a link and if you do look at it you get a good view of the back of my head. It is well worth a look:-
Kissing Without Prejudice Photography Project

I'll leave with a picture that Diana took where I was staying that is similar to the first taken when I was in The Village.

                                                                     Full Circle

Take care and look after each other.
Karen xxx                                            

Near Perfect Day

Friday
The first 2 days just seemed to disappear (see last post).

The plan for the day was Diana and myself would meet up with Kate and Kitty at the Christmas market near the town hall. We decided to go into the Arndale first where Diana got a picture of me with a giant Freddie Mercury advertising the stage show 'We Will Rock You'.

Diana managed to get herself a really nice pair of boots while we were in The Arndale. I also got my nails done again.

It came to time that we made our way to the Christmas Market to meet Kate and Kitty.Kate had given us a cryptic clue that they would be near the singing moose.

We made our way to the market. At a crossing we saw Kate waiting to cross on the other side. The funny thing was when it came to cross Kate passed right by us and never noticed. We  had to stop her. She was going to an ATM, so we continued on looking for Kitty and the singing moose. We eventually found her and had a cup of gluhwein and then another one when Kate arrived. A cold November day, but for me standing in the Christmas Market with my friends sipping ghulwein and a singing moose head it really did feel like Christmas.

We decided to go into the city hall to escape the cold where there was a jewellery exhibition mainly works by local artists. There were some nice pieces and some unusual ones. I also noticed a plaque dedicated to those volunteers who joined The International Brigades and fought against fascism during The Spanish Civil War. In my time I have met a couple of veterans of that conflict who have long since passed on. I always think of it as a forgotten conflict which was a prelude to the world wide fight for freedom, World War Two.

Below is a link

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/International_Brigades

Diana and myself had to get back to the Village to get changed and go for something to eat as we were going to see The Nutcracker ballet at The Palace Theater.

When Diana suggested going I was very keen. I had never been to see a ballet before. I remember as a kid my sister loved her dance classes which ballet was a big part off. I wasn't jealous of her, I just wished I could at the time do what she did. That wasn't to be I had to do boy things. I wasn't that good at most sports except I seemed  better at basketball and tennis than my class mates. That didn't help much as football or rugby were what counted.
We got to the Palace Theater and it looked like there would be a full house. I must admit to feeling excited. It was nice to be able to sit and have a drink before the start. It came time to take our seats. The whole performance was spellbinding and absolutely beautiful. It felt even more like Christmas watching the story unfold in music, movement and dance.
Below is a link to an overview of the Nutcracker.
   http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Nutcracker
All to soon it was over. I think Diana enjoyed it as much as I did. The work that must go into a production I cam only guess at. A beautiful Christmas story that transports you to a place with no computers, hi tech special effects etc. Instead the imagination is stimulated and you see and feel the beauty of life in one of its highest forms.
Diana suggested once we left the theater getting a picture of me outside the theater. She understands how important memories of my times out and anything that helps with those are to me.

We finished of the evening by going to Naps where we got talking to a woman who was out with her friends for what sounded like a birthday pub crawl. We got the usual questions. Why? Are you gay? Have you or are you going to change sex? Then, are you married? I don't mind answering questions as long as people are not nasty or rude. We finished of the night with a bit of dancing.

Nothing can ever be perfect, but I'd had a near perfect day with 3 of my best friends.

If you read this. Thank you Diana, Kate and Kitty.

Christmas came early.